When my ex husband dumped me, and after the fog had cleared, I picked myself up and looked for the fast track to heal. No stalking, no following, no “checking in”. Think about this: Do you feel GOOD when you do any of this behavior? Do you think any of this is helping you heal, or helping him want to be with you, or helping anything? Truth: The only thing you’re getting out of this is feeling worse about yourself and your situation. And you may slip, just just try harder next time. Don’t google him, don’t drive by his house, don’t send him innocent “hi” texts, don’t tell your friend to tell him you’ve been thinking of him, nothing. But, here are the most important things I’ve learned along the way: #1 Quit stalking him.ĭon’t just unfriend him on Facebook, block him. I’ve made some mistakes in my journey to healing that have dragged out the process. While every situation is unique, I’ve compiled a list of things that in retrospect, I’ve learned. They tell me everything they did for this guy, that they are so broken hearted and they end the email with “please help me, what should I do?” Over the last few years I’ve received many emails from women all over the world, pouring out their hearts about some guy that dumped them. However, this post isn’t about poor me and all the boys that have broken my heart. (BTW, this is sounding like I’m a total hot mess, no?) So, it’s fair to say I’ve had some experience in this department. Then when I was 30, my husband dumped me. He dumped me to “spend more time with his friends” which the next day I found out really meant he wanted to date a cute freshman that had been flirting with him. I was 16 and we had been dating a whole year.

Tears streamed down my face in math class as I read, “I feel like we’re just friends that hold hands.” In other words, Mr First Boyfriend dumped me because I wouldn’t go to second base with him. It was my first boyfriend and after about 6 months of dating, he walked me to class, handed me a note and that was it. More recently, I write books, ( here and here) host a podcast and you can look around the site to check out the retreats I host for women, as well as the private work and group classes I host. Thanks for reading this post! If you're brand new around here, please note that getting over heartbreak is no longer the central theme of my work.

My ex and i are still in love